You Can't Hug A Car Goodbye

It's time to say goodbye and let go of my Ford Escape. It's just a material object and yet it's so much more than that, which I'm realized as I cleaned it out. Reminiscing about the road I traveled with this car makes it all the more important to me. 

My Ford Escape has been my reliable mode of transportation for 10 years. We've ridden a lot of miles together. E was in a car seat when we bought it. She transitioned into a booster seat and then into the front seat. I remember that transition well. Being able to see her next to me instead of a rear view mirror was a major upgrade. I remember her asking me what the CD player eject button was for. I asked her, "what do you think it is for?" She said, "it ejects you out of the car?" I still laugh thinking about it. A sign of the times. 

I've waiting in traffic, in drive-thru lanes grabbing food on the go, doing nightly bank deposits and at stop lights thousands of times. E and I've waiting in it when it wouldn't start in 20 degree weather. That'll test your patience. I've waiting in my Escape for my toddler to practice dance in pink ballet slippers and I've waiting for my teenager to finish art classes 2 years in a row. 

In my car I've read books, I've sang, I've prayed, I've cried, and I've laughed. I've gotten through my worst days and some of my best days driving in my car. I've taken countless selfies with my family, made videos when I felt inspired. I've sat a little longer to finish a song on the radio or a phone call before moving on to the next moment of my day. 

My escape has taken me home to my parents dozens of times, to my siblings for coffee or puzzle time. It got me to book club once a month for last few years. Always bringing me to occasions with high anticipation for conversations and laughter. And then it brought me home, safely. 

I've given people rides in my car, picked up my nieces and nephews in my car. I've ridden shot gun in this car when Ryan and I would have to carpool. It's saved us time and time again. 

I paid off this car and many other debts as it carried me to work 5 days a week for those 10 years. When I got my Escape I was taking a completely different exit to work each day. I was a different person then. I've grown a lot in the 10 years I've been driving that car.

So much relied on my silver Escape. I relied on my silver Escape. 

You know, you can't hug a car goodbye. But as I remove the stone decor from my rearview mirror and close it's door for the last time I have nothing but gratitude for my Escape. You can't hug a car goodbye, but you can have miles and miles of gratitude for it. 

Always lead with your heart.

- Karlee

2011 Me Would Be Confused, But Proud

Hey it's me! I have a truth for you and a long over due update. 

My truth and small confession: I didn’t really mean to stop writing here. Life just… filled up.

Somewhere between raising a little girl who isn’t so little anymore, building a career I care deeply about, and finding small creative outlets like crocheting, gardening, and reading, writing slowly slipped to the side.

To be honest, I think the pressure of posting or having something perfectly put together to try to gain views became an undesirable focus, so I quit. But I’ve missed this space. I miss the act of noticing things and putting them into words to document my journey and to inspire others. Ya know, those ordinary moments that don’t feel like much at the time, but somehow become everything when you look back? Yeah, those.

Life feels different now than it did back in 2011 when I first started this blog. Who would've thought I'd start a blog right before I was married and pick it up again 14 years married, 2 houses and an apartment, 1 step daughter, 1 baby (now teenager), 8 nieces & nephews, and 3 cats later (RIP Sebastian)? I think 2011 me would be confused, but proud. 

My life is fuller in some ways, heavier in others, but also more grounded. I see things differently. I move a little different. I notice more. 

So I’m coming back, but not in the same way.

This space won’t be about keeping up or doing it “right.” It’ll be shorter entries, real moments like what I'm crocheting in my favorite spot on the couch, and whatever feels worth remembering like family movie nights and the day Edee decided swearing feels right. Sometimes it might be what I’m making, some weeks what I’m learning, and some weeks just a few thoughts I want to document.

And for the parts of life that are places we go, work life and all bookish things, I’ve been sharing those over at Booked In Michigan, which I’ll link here from time to time.

Here's my commitment to writing more, again. I’m really glad to be back. 

As always, keep loving,

- Karlee

We have a teenager! Edee turns 13!

 What? 13?! You're 13 today. Officially a teenager and my mama heart is in shock. It's truly amazing that you're this healthy, tall, sassy, determined, teenager. You're making all your own choices and forging a path of your own. As your Mom, it's pretty cool to witness.

I'm 99% sure if you weren't thriving as a 13 year old my Mama heart would break because now, I can't fix everything. Cuddles and tickles once took away your tears but all of a sudden your emotions are big and "I don't get it." Even if, so much of what you're going through is like looking in the mirror at my adolescents. 

With every new year of your life I learn 1,000 things, about you, about myself, about how to raise you, and how to love you best. And with every year you change so much, showing us how smart, creative and silly you are again and again.

In the blink of an eye you went from dancing in pretty dresses to singing Weezer at the top of your lungs.

You once loved the stuffed animals with "the big eyes and little bodies," to using a squish mellow for a pillow. Your stuffed animal collection never ends. 

Your video game choices are typically Dandy's World, 99 Nights in the Forest, and Cookie Kingdom or something like that. Which just reminds me of Cookie Swirl C videos you and Grandma watched on repeat when you were still small enough to fit in our laps. 

You remind me of your big sister, with your boy shorts and sometimes I see her smile in your smile, her personality in yours. 

You went from hating school to a brand new school where you finally got excited to go, even if it means it's  because you made a handful of new friends that are 'your people.' Everyone told me you just need to find your people and I thank God that day was the first day of school this year.

You're still marching to the beat of your own drum. Right now that looks like band t-shirts, fuzzy short hair, graphic novels, "Kandi" bead bracelets and coloring your nails with black Sharpie. Dad said, no more drawing all over your skin. 

You're so passionate about your people, your YouTube channel and your cats (still). You are not passionate about food but we're always gently encouraging you to choose a fruit to go with your funnyuns. But somedays I wonder if you'll turn into a Wesco slushie - even if we limit them to one a week. 

You asked me last week if you can take a Gap year this year. Oh bug, you're so silly! However, you are insistent you will not be going to college and you will own your own business. I have no doubt in my mind that will be true 5 years down the road. I just hope you let me design your logo. ;)

I have a feeling your going to bring us even more lessons, joy and love through your teen years. As much as I miss your chubby cheeks and toddler giggles I know I'll miss these years too. So, I'm holding onto every day of your first year of a teenager. 

We are so very very proud of the girl you are and the passion you carry with you. Always sweet and creative, sometimes silly and sensitive. Happy 13th Birthday, bug!

Life Lately: Books, Seeds, Art Club, and Renovations

If I've repeated anything on my blog it's probably: Time flies, or life moves quickly. Weekends move quicker than week days but, then I look back at the week and feel like it flew by. For so many reasons, including: that I haven't made much time for writing lately, I am summing up this update with a few of the joys we have had lately. I think it's important to find joy as you're speeding through the day. So here's ours:

I finished two books last week. One was a major accomplishment because one: it was an assignment for work and two: I started it in December. I learned some things, but mostly I am proud that I stuck with it and completed it. It was a big read for me. If you'd like to read more about it, I share my current reads and book finds on Instagram. 

We planted our seed (starters) for our garden. We as in all three of us and E's friend. It was important to me to include the girls in the process so that they can experience growing their own food start to finish. 

I am excited about tomatoes, red peppers (for Edee) and cucumbers but I am very excited about the salad mix we planted. Within 2 days we saw sprouts. On day 3 we say purple sprouts! That was a pleasant surprise. My main goal is to grow everything to make a salad. It's going to be such a delicious goal to achieve. 

E joined an Art club! Talk about cool! I can't wait to see what she learns. I pray she enjoys it and find friends with similar interests. I am so happy for this quick development. I should've signed myself up.

 *Update* She found her people. I picked her up from Art club yesterday and she said, "I had the best day ever!" She exchanged phone numbers with two kids and said they couldn't stop talking about all the things. 

Our bedroom renovation project is underway. Ryan has been up to his elbows in planning for it. We're converting our garage into a master bedroom. Currently we're sleeping in the smallest room that will eventually be an art studio. As we work through the process of the renovation my goal is to remember how much we hoped and dreamed and planned to be where we are now. I remind us both that this is all supposed to be fun. We get to choose paint colors, carpet and lighting. We get to choose and make our dreams real life. 

Well, there it is. books, seeds, art club and renovations. I can't wait to see where each of these things leads because you know, there's so much transformation happening in these joyful things. 

Keep loving,

Karlee

15 Reasons Why I Choose To Love You Every Day

15 years ago I gave you the key to my apartment, a day we'll never forget because it was also the day I gave you my heart. I've given it to you every day since. Because, like they say, love is a choice. Once the butterflies have settled it's ultimately choosing to love that makes a relationship work. Here's 15 reasons why I choose to love you every day:

1. You're committed. Committed to us, our dreams and our family. 

2. You're funny. You still make me laugh, even on the hard days. 

3. Because you love the outdoors.

4. You see me for who I am but, also call me out when I need it. 

5. Because you're a loyal guy.

6. You're Edee's Daddy. 

7. You're a great cook! I'd starve without you.

8. Because doing life without you would be boring.

9. You add the element of surprise to regular ol' days.

10. You listen.

11. You keep me safe.

12. Because we're growing together.

13. You love to drive and you're good at it, too.

14. You're smart.

15. You make life interesting and fun.

It should come as no surprise that we're standing the test of time but it does. I still feel luck to be your wife and to call you my husband and my Valentine.

Happy 15th Valentine's Day, Ryan!

We Bought A House!

 Thursday, August 15th | 3:25pm

Well, followers, we're finally here. We finally made it. House shopping!! We got our pre-approval yesterday! To be honest, I almost didn't believe my husband when he told me we got pre-approved. (Although it was in my email inbox, too.) It's just been a VERY long journey of trying to get to this point. Sometimes just paying debt and saving money felt suffocating. 

But, it's time to believe it's true because we're going to look at a house tonight. One that is in our price range, too. Don't get me started on the housing market. 

10:10pm

Okay, we not only saw one house, we saw three houses!! They just got better and better as we went down the line. From not enough space but a great location, to cramped and a nice yard to absolutely perfect! The 3rd house we looked at has the right size of yard. It's on a quiet street. It has a beachy feel, new appliances and it's completely redone with the right amount of space to make it our own. 

I'm head over heels. I'm freaking out. I'm jumping up and down while also trying to keep my cool. Can you tell keeping my cool is not working? 

The very small percentage of my brain that is logical knows there can be bumps in the road in the next steps of the process but the rest of the part of my brain (all emotional) is freaking out! It's just gorgeous! I have to believe it's true because this week my mantra is 'believe in yourself.' I have to believe we are finally here. 

We both agreed that it feels right. I prayed God would let it be if this was in his plans for us. I will continue to pray and have patience with a little excitement but I have a deep feeling this is it, people! 

August 16th 1:00PM

We met with our realtor and reviewed possible hiccups and put in an offer. Fingers crossed, people!

August 17th 4:00PM

What a let down. Our offer wasn't accepted. I'm sad and annoyed. And that's all I have to say about that.

A few days later

The house we wanted went pending. I guess that's officially official that it's not our future home. It would've been perfect.

August 21st 8:00PM

We caught the sunset on our way back from seeing a house, another cute house, that feels just out of reach. Is it my fear to repeat the past? Is it the truth?...

Sept 7th 9:00PM

Well, it's been about a month long rollercoaster of back and forth debates between living in the same town or moving towards work, buying a fixer upper or not. We toured a few more houses and made an offer on one that got shot down. I probably would've cried if we weren't surrounded by friends playing board games together when we received the news. 

It's been an emotional and exhausting ride. Currently I feel like throwing in the towel and renting for another year. I don't know what the right thing to do is. I don't know if we can handle another tour, another house we can picture as our home, another denied offer. 

Friday, Sept 13th, 5:00pm (Yes, Friday the 13th)

Our offer got ACCEPTED!!! I'm not lying! Even if it is Friday the 13th.

Okay, pause. Back track. 

The 3rd house we fell in love with that we saw on the first day of house hunting went back on the market. We jumped on it! 

Ryan did some researching, okay a lot of researching, on things we thought were keeping us from getting this house: remember those hiccups I mentioned above?

He also spent so much time on the phone with our lender and realtor. Thank God for him. Thank God for them. 

Sept 17th, 9:20PM - Home Inspection Day 

Today, we took our lunch break and met the inspector. He was pretty cool. I just really wanted to see the house again but we learned a lot as he went through his review. 

And the inspection was positive! There were 2 minor things and that was it. 

I texted Ryan a few hours after our inspection and said, "do we really get this house?" 

Yes, we really get this house! Belief is a beautiful thing. 

October 10th, 2023 5:45pm

We got our last approval! And we found out our interest rate lowered as well! We got the call from our lender while at a work function in Grand Rapids. We were already having a fun evening and this news quickly added to the joy of the evening. We're so EXCITED!!! 

High fives and hugs and congrats all around. We finally made it! We close on the 18th, just 8 days away we get the keys to our new home. 

October 14, 2024 6:30pm

We got the Clear to Close! On Friday we sign the paperwork and get the keys to our new house! 

Ryan is ready to move right in. I thought it would be a slow transition. He said, "it's been a 6 year transition, let's go!" He's right! 

I've been methodically packing 6 years of our lives into totes and boxes. Thank God a friend let us borrow totes so I'm using those temporarily for the things that will get unpacked right away: dishes, food, bedding. I'm rather proud of my process so far. My brother was right when he said packing happens pretty fast once you start. 

What a wild ride, though! We're finally getting a house! Leaving our apartment will be bittersweet. We've had great neighbors and have made so many memories here. We have family and friends that live in the complex too. It's been a really good apartment for us but we're ready!

October 18th, 2024

We closed today! The house is officially ours! We did it! I have so many emotions right now but the biggest thing I feel is grateful. Grateful for our patience, perseverance, and hard work. Grateful for answered prayers, our realtor and lender and their assistants. Grateful for our team at work and our friends and family! The home shopping and buying journey wouldn't be the same without all the love and support we've received. We're so grateful! 

XOXO,

Karlee

A Month of Celebrations

October is a month of celebrations. 

It's the month I joined the MIG team,

The month I became a Mom, 

and it's the month I married the love of my life. 

This month I am fortunate that I get to celebrate commitment, dedication, honesty, hope, growth, health, faith, joy and my favorite, love. 

11 years serving others, growing my marketing and design skills, growing in leadership and relationships with people I happily call my team. I read a saying the other day about make sure you work with good people then going to work is good too. My Grandpa always said, do what you love and you'll never work a day in your life. Some people are so wise. I find both things equally true. Not every day is perfect but, I do work with good people and I do love the work I do. 

Edee turned 12 on the 2nd. A friend reminded me on her birthday that the day is important for me too because it's the day I became a Mom. We celebrated in so many fun ways for her but I celebrated too. Seeing her happy, healthy and loving life is the best gift I could receive every year. 

And last, but not least, my wedding anniversary, which just happens to be today. Today we celebrate 13 years since we tied the knot, made the choice of a lifetime and said I do. I look back at our year together and remember times we laughed, times we cried, days we traveled far and days we stayed home, nights we were together and night we were apart. I know we had arguments, I can't event tell you what about. I know we had happiness and joy and love. I can tell you what that's about because I felt it through the days and still feel it now. 

Now you can see why October is my favorite month! It's a time of celebrations for so many beautiful reasons.